Career change at 59 - Crisis leading to positive change.
Is career change even possible at 59? What if we’re looking after our elderly or dying parents? Can a forced pause have any benefits? Is it possible to find a way out of depression and anxiety? In this article, Amelia Evans tells her story of crisis and how it enabled her change.
I began a new career at the age of 59, and now I write for a living.
Having a little more faith in myself
Midlife was the most surprising and astonishing time of my life. It was the time when I remembered myself, and found my true purpose. It didn't come easily, though. In fact, it was a rather difficult and challenging journey - at least that's the polite way to describe it. I followed the path until I found myself at the end of my journey - and I was given rewards I never could have imagined.
I suddenly realised my soul had been slowly seeping out of me through years of doing what I detested, simply to gather a pay cheque every other Friday.
The story of my journey.
Ten years ago, I worked as a materials manager in an industry I hated. I was stuck in a cycle of anxiety and depression that I believed was inescapable.
Something had to give, and I finally had a breakdown.
I lost my job. At 42, I suddenly realized my soul had been slowly seeping out of me through years of doing what I detested, simply to gather a pay cheque every other Friday.
The philosopher Soren Kierkegaard wrote: “The greatest hazard of all, losing one's self, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all.”
I certainly did not recognize the defeated and depressed individual that inhabited my body. I entered a desperate period of despair.
We learn what is possible by doing what we think is impossible.
We cannot imagine what the universe has in store for us. To even attempt to do so is mind-boggling. I certainly did not expect the circumstances into which I was rather forcibly thrown.
My mother became quite ill, and suddenly the woman who never needed anything needed help. She wanted to live in a retirement home, but her diabetes proved too difficult to manage.
Within a week, I brought her home and became her caretaker. The next months were difficult. I was frequently exhausted and frustrated. But what I learned over the next six months changed both of our lives.
What I discovered through this odd twist of fate is that we can do so much more than we believe we can.
I had never imagined I would take care of my mother at the end of her life. I did not believe that I would have the fortitude for such intensive, difficult, 24-hour-a-day effort. She required almost constant care. My spouse and my daughter pitched in where they could. Since my daughter is a night owl, I managed to nab a few hours of sleep here and there during the nights. My spouse supplied a few hours over the weekend.
My anxiety and depression began to fall away as I became more confident. By doing what I had perceived as impossible, I discovered my possibilities.
I had never imagined I would take care of my mother at the end of her life.
Learning from my mother
Most amazingly, for the first time in my life, my mom and I talked. We talked of our hopes, our dreams, and our accomplishments. And we talked some more.
I learned so very much from her before she died. I found out she flew airplanes, rode horses, raced cars, and fell off dirt bikes. My favourite story was about the time she was found out when her parents watched her win a car race - on television! I truly can't imagine my proper grandmother's horror at that moment!
Remembering Myself
During her more painful moments - when she did not feel like talking - I talked to her about myself. She learned more about me in six months than she had in my entire lifetime. I told her of my degree in history, and how I passionately love the arts. I rather suddenly remembered that I write. I told her of my award-winning paper, of my scholarships and stipends. I remembered me.
I started journaling again when she slept and when we sat outdoors together. She could watch birds, squirrels, and our pet dogs play for hours without ever becoming discontent. I could write for hours.
My mother left us one cold winter morning a few weeks before Christmas. It was time, and I know she is no longer hurting. Neither am I.
My new Career as a Blogger and Freelance Writer
I began a new career at the age of 59, and now I write for a living.
I had no choice but to accept the facts, and the facts were that I needed to carry on. I somehow knew that I could honour her memory best by doing what it is I have been given to do. I began a new career at the age of 59, and now I write for a living.
I frequently joke that I sell my soul for pennies. That is, however, entirely untrue. I sold my soul for pennies in a commercial industry, long ago and far away. Now I give freely of myself and my experience, both in my personal blog and as a freelance writer. I am not wealthy, not in the material sense. But I’m infinitely rich in joy because I’m doing what I was meant to do.
All Things Are Possible
When life throws me a curveball and nothing seems to make sense, I keep writing. Rediscovering my gift was the best thing that ever happened to me. I have my mother and fate to thank for that.
Most people don't learn quite as slowly as I did - I've actually never been accused of having an excess of common sense.
These same principles apply to everyone, and you don't have to be in your forties or fifties to find yourself.
Do What You Love!
We all have a special talent. (Lucia calls these our “Superpowers”) and we can we use that talent - not only to make a living, but to help others.
We all have a special talent. (Lucia calls these our “Superpowers”) and we can we use that talent - not only to make a living, but to help others.
We are living in difficult times. We can each use our gifts to brighten our own little corner of the world. Whatever it is you love, whatever you do best, do that with all your might.
Change your life, and you will change others simply by virtue of your contentment. Dare to be yourself, and to be your best.
Amelia Evans is a freelance writer and works as a content manager in Be in Health. When Amelia is not researching and writing she loves nothing more than heading out into the country for some downtime. You can see more of her articles here: ameliaevans.contently.com
