13 Things I’m glad I did since quitting my job without a plan (even if I don’t recommend that as your career change strategy)
In June 2015, I simultaneously exited my office of eight years and walked away from a twenty-year corporate career, without a plan.
I didn’t step gingerly into the unknown - I sprinted as fast as my legs could carry me into the unknown, with exceedingly little knowledge, without even a sliver of a plan - never mind a Plan B!
That’s not quite the whole truth.
I had indeed semi-planned the first step…
Throughout my life, I’d always planned the first step of an escape, never thinking about the long-term plan. But I was a mum and a wife now…escape wasn’t so easy.
An Escape Plan.
Throughout my life, I’d always planned the first step of an escape and watched to see what happened next.
I escaped Northern Ireland aged 16 to join the American Field Service exchange programme, testing life out in America (but signed a promise in blood with my parents to return to study A Levels).
A levels completed, I escaped to study in England – a place where I would not be judged by my surname. (It’s Kelly by the way, which is the second most common Catholic name in Ireland after…Murphy of course!)
Years later, I escaped the rain of Manchester and was lured to the sunshiny world of London as a new graduate.
Three years later, having researched nothing other than endless episodes of Neighbours in my youth, I escaped the British climate for Sydney.
Five years later, I escaped the ex-pat bubble to settle back in UK with my fiancé, thereby also escaping singledom.
Then I stopped.
Nine long years I sat still. A husband and two children later, I’d also grown accustomed to the British weather - which was perfectly suited to my Celtic freckles - but my career had become a problem.
Whilst my seniority, pay, credibility and network all expanded over that time, I couldn’t figure out why the mechanics of doing a role that I’d learned to do twenty years earlier, had suddenly become unfulfilling.
What I knew with certainty was that I was fading out.
Adults don’t escape, do they?
I felt like a washed-out version of myself.
I got really tired of trying to work out what to do. At the same time, every day, I was quashing my historically-natural desire to escape, because I KNEW that adults don’t escape.
They stick and make the best of their situation. They continue to share mortgages, childcare costs, holidays and extra stuff that makes them forget their Monday-to-Friday drudgery.
I might be shamed by my failure, but at least I would have attempted an escape. There would be dignity in that…wouldn’t there?
But escape found me and lured me away.
It lured me towards drastic action - to shake up my career and give a whole different kind of life a go.
I could see my future on the well-trodden path before me. It wasn’t attractive.
What I couldn’t see was the outcome if I made a change.
I couldn’t see around the corner after the first step in the plan.
But, I was really excited about that first step. I knew I could always get a job in my old industry if I ended up stuck. That became my backup plan.
I might be ashamed of my failure, but at least I would have attempted an escape. There would be dignity in that…wouldn’t there?
But, I knew I wouldn’t go back.
I knew I would fight with every breath I had, to figure out the next step forward - the next step in my non-existent plan.
I escaped into a world of Psychology, one I knew little about…other than it exciting me. I’d spent an Amazonian fortune reading books on that topic over years. Decades, if I’m honest.
I escaped to do a full-time MSc Psychology, alongside becoming a full-time mum for the first time in my 8 year journey as a mum. (AWKWARD TRUTH: The latter was, actually, the scarier of the two!)
Fast-forward to today. I could never have predicted where I’d end up or what I’d end up doing.
Things I’m so glad I did…
1. Deciding that I wasn’t going to be in the same place, this time next year.
It was a Tuesday night around my birthday.
I’d worked a full day, dashed to pick up my two daughters, whizzed them to bed as quickly as was possible, shouted at the older one for not moving fast enough. Dashed downstairs to conduct a telephone interview with a Finance Director. He was perfect for the role. I, on the other hand, was not.
I felt like a crap mother, on top of a bored worker-bee.
I didn’t want to keep doing this. I couldn’t see a future I liked the look of. I hadn’t learned anything valuable for years.
Even more shameful, I didn’t know what I wanted to learn!
Enough was enough.
2. Taking one step forward - new doors don’t open if you’re HIDING behind them.
I’d been hiding behind new doors for years. God knows what shape my head and life would be in today if I hadn’t opened one of them.
3. Paring down my lifestyle - just in case.
I’ve never bought designer clothes but my husband and I love, love, love travelling. One of the chaps at work nicknamed me Judith Charmers and started most conversations with “Where are you off to next?”
We saved more than we used to. Savvy shopping became our norm.
We stopped looking for the bigger house and overpaid as much as we could on the mortgage.
Then, we worked out how we could afford to live without my salary, while also paying to go to university.
4. Resigning - It was easier than I imagined.
I don’t think this was much of a shock to anyone - perhaps my unhappiness was more obvious than I’d thought?
I walked out of the office lightly. Weirdly. Without sadness. Not afraid. Comfortable with my decision. with even a frisson of curiosity and excitement about what might happen next.
5. Learning new stuff.
After a painfully difficult 18-month period of absorbing, analysing and critiquing international research on personality, neuroscience, psychology through the ages, consumer behaviour, psychopathy and statistics, I was knee-walkingly exhausted.
I took joy in walking the Surrey Hills alone with my podcasts, learning exactly what I wanted to learn (rather that what I would get tested on). It helped me decide how to move forward with my career.
I wish I’d learned more, sooner.
6. Experimenting in career and life.
I did so many experiments, they became a way of life - and even wrote an article about them.
Here’s just a few of the experiments I conducted to help me figure out my future:
shadowed and trained in depression and anxiety counselling,
trained in bereavement counselling,
became a bereavement care volunteer,
volunteered in anxiety groups,
interviewed a bunch of executive coaches about their work,
met clinical psychologists,
attended coaching forums and training sessions,
attended local small business groups,
attended conferences,
signed up to on-line and in-person training and
listened to podcasts in every free minute, and much more!
I quickly decided what I didn’t want to do…
I didn’t want to spend another three or four years qualifying in something that I didn’t yet know whether I would be any good at.
7. Figuring out what I was good at...no...great at.
I now call these unique talents “Superpowers”. (read more about them here)
Through reading about 100 studies, books, online courses, international research, webinars and podcasts, I learned that the foundations of a fulfilling career lie in doing what you love doing.
Then I spent time figuring out what I love doing, why and how it makes me feel.
This work has been developed into the very first part of the Personalised Redesign programme.
8. Writing a brief summary of every non-fiction book I read and love.
It soon became obvious that my brain was filled to overflowing with new stuff.
I decided to write a quick summary on every relevant book I read on creating my own business.
This was invaluable, helping me see through the crap, deciding what to include and what to exclude.
I still do this.
9. Learning how to make my own website.
One of my Superpowers is learning new stuff and actioning it so quickly that I can’t even remember learning it.
And example: Whilst my technical ineptitude was legendary in my old firm’s IT helpdesk, once I researched the existence of intuitive DIY website design companies, I just had to give it a go.
I bought the business name for £20 and used the 14 day free Squarespace trial to see if I could do it.
Not only could I do it, but I loved doing it!
Years on, the website has plenty of flaws…but you can pay £10,000s for a website before you have made a bean of profit…and that didn’t sound sensible. Once I’d mastered something that I’d thought would be the hardest thing, I was off!
I could do anything! I hadn’t asked my techie husband for help once, which I think left him (and me!) gobsmacked.
10. Getting a coach.
There is a limit to what I (and anyone) can learn quickly. Where the gaps are too big, there seems only one choice - get help!
Marketing was my massive gap.
So, I emptied my ever-decreasing bank account, paying for a marketing coach for 6 months with 4 other entrepreneurs. I was the least experienced in the room. Some had had their own businesses for 20 years but still hadn’t mastered marketing.
I still feel like a novice…but it’s the thing I invest my spare time and a chunk of my earnings learning about…even years later.
I’ve discovered a fascinating world that I’d previously discounted.
And I’ve always invested in getting help. I prefer one-to-one help now - as time is so precious and I’m so impatient. For the last few years I’ve even invested in two-to-one help from Andrew and Pete.
11. LEAN MUSCLED ADAPTABILITY.
My view of enjoyable, fulfilling, successful work is that once you’ve Discovered your Superpowers, you then need to perform lots of consciously planned, tiny, nimble experiments - until you find what fits.
Some of my work-related experiments included; experimenting on group work, trying public speaking, experimenting with different networking styles and groups, trying out different coaches, speaking to different publishers, attending events for different audiences, trying different products and services, trying different locations, experimenting with different social media and PR strategies.
I think most good businesses keep experimenting for as long as they’re in business.
12. Deciding on my tiny niche.
Every podcast I listened to discussed narrowing your niche. Scary, if you don’t know if the chosen niche is right for you - or if you are right for it!
Since deciding to focus on helping people in their 40s and 50s redesign their career, I knew who to target, what language to use, what their fears were and what strategies and frameworks might help them.
When I get emails saying “It felt like you were speaking to me”, I know I’ve done it right.
13. Deleting the idea of perfectionism. Realising that nothing about me is perfect. I’m flawed, and that’s ok.
Putting my stuff into the world is scary.
I’ve got nowhere to hide.
It’s my truth as I see it…even if the message is unpopular - like the 50 year old corporate toast article, I’m going to share it.
It doesn’t connect with everyone.
I don’t connect with everyone.
I’m not perfect.
My eye for detail is flawed. My eye for design is flawed. My ability to find the right word at the right time is flawed. And there are 1000 other personal flaws that make me far less than perfect at anything.
But, I’ve designed my business and my programmes to celebrate the Superpowers of all of my readers, all of my clients, and all of me.
That’s why some people choose to follow me, read my book, listen to my book on Audible and work with me.
If you liked this article, you might like these too….
50 year old corporate toast, the silent career trend that not enough people are talking about.
(Case Study) When boring becomes unbearable. What Joelyn did next.
5 questions worth asking and answering - when you’re feeling stuck.
Two programmes for you
Check out the done-for-you and done-with-you Personalised Redesign programmmes. There are two options - fast and Speedy Sherpa. Read unedited reviews of working with me on a one-to-one basis here.
Or if you have more patience, and a little more time on your hands, you might prefer my signature career DIY transformation programme called The Fierce Emporium. Watch honest video reviews here.
No Ordinary Career Transformation Programme. Extraordinary change - designed by you.
