Lucia Knight
A Joy At Work Experiment: Learn to Listen
In our working society, true listening is a rarely spotted talent in many workplaces. Yet, in our uber-competitive world, it has the power to differentiate you from your colleagues, make a standout impression on your boss, and deepen personal relationships with colleagues. It's the ultimate free tool for connection and personal growth. So let’s learn how to listen better.
In our working society, true listening is a rarely spotted talent in many workplaces. Yet, in our uber-competitive world, it has the power to differentiate you from your colleagues, make a standout impression on your boss, and deepen personal relationships with colleagues. It's the ultimate free tool for connection and personal growth.
Poor listening can lead to feelings of disconnection, frustration, and a lack of belonging, as illustrated by a client's experience. Conversely, being a great listener can stand out to bosses and deepen relationships.
I share practical tactics to elevate your listening skills and challenge you to put them to the test in this week's experiment: in your next conversation, focus entirely on the other person and observe the transformative effects.
[00:30] The Cost of Poor Listening
[01:52] The Power of True Listening
[02:33] Practical Tactics for Better Listening
[04:17] This Week's Joy at Work Experiment - Be An Active Listener
The Joy At Work Experiment: Be An Active Listener
In your next conversation, focus entirely on the other person and observe the transformative effects. Use these five tips to help you truly listen to the other person.
#1: Ask questions and pause.
#2: Put away your phone.
#3: Limit your use of the pronoun “I”
#4: Engage with your whole body. Make eye contact and turn towards them.
#5: Understand if the individual is seeking to share, get an opinion or needs help.
Next Steps:
If you enjoyed this, you might also enjoy my Life Satisfaction Assessment. It's a 30-minute program where I guide you through a deep dive into 10 areas of your life to assess what's bringing you joy and what's bringing you down. I call it Derailed and it's a fabulous place to begin a joy-at-work redesign.
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Learn to Listen - A Joy At Work Experiment
Lucia Knight: You're busy, yeah? There's never enough time to focus on your future work happiness. But if you don't focus on it, things just stay the same, don't they? In these short episodes, I wanna give you some tiny ideas, some mini experiments to try out this week to either dial down a pain point for you at work or dial up your potential for joy at work.
Let's dive in.
The Cost of Poor Listening
Lucia Knight: There are deep costs associated with poor listening that are often overlooked. Disconnection, frustration, and an absence of that wonderful sense of belonging to a group of people to whom you matter.
As one client discovered years after being the go to listener for her colleagues, her friends, and her family. She realized her generosity was never reciprocated, ever. No one ever asked her a clarifying question or a deepening question. They were much more interested in talking about their own situations, which left her feeling unseen, unheard and unimportant, which over years began to negatively affect her confidence.
Here's another little story about listening. A new client said that one of the things that attracted her to me was when she walked past me consulting with another client through the window in a building I used to work from. She said it looked so different to other conversations that she saw happening in her business every day.
I was 100 percent engaged in that person's words, taking occasional notes, listening quietly as they formed their thoughts to a question I had posed. Until then, I never really thought about what it looks like when two humans are really listening to each other.
The Power of True Listening
Lucia Knight: But let's be frank, most of us struggle with true listening in our busy worlds.
In our working society, which demands more, more, more, for less, less, less, true listening is a rarely spotted talent in many workplaces. Yet, in our competitive world, our uber competitive world, it has the power to differentiate you from your colleagues, make a standout impression on your boss, and deepen personal relationships with colleagues.
It's the ultimate free tool for connection and personal growth.
Practical Tactics for Better Listening
Lucia Knight: Before I tell you this week's joy at work experiment, here are some practical tactics to elevate your listening game at work.
Number one. Ask questions and pause. By pause, I mean zip your lip. Show genuine curiosity by asking clarifying, thoughtful questions. Then give the speaker space to elaborate. Silence often invites depth and it is a total gift to introverts who struggle to think and speak articulately at the same time, as opposed to our extroverted cousins who need to speak to think.
Number two, forget the phone. A real conversation deserves your undivided attention. Social media notifications can always wait. If the phone must be on the table with you because you're expecting an urgent call, for goodness sake, place it face down.
Three, practice reflective listening. In tricky or complex situations, try to summarize what the other person has said to show understanding and encourage further elaboration. Limit I statements. Focus on their story, not your own. This enhances trust and connection.
Four, engage and be present. Look into their eyes. Turn your body towards them. Notice their body language. Tune in to what's being said and put effort into understanding whether the individual is seeking just to share, seeking an opinion, or asking for help in working through a problem.
This Week's Joy at Work Experiment - Be An Active Listener
Lucia Knight: Here it is. Our joy at work experiment this week is in your very next conversation. Focus entirely on the other person. No interruptions, no distractions, no using the word I and ask questions and then pause to really listen. Notice how they respond and how you feel afterwards.
You may find that this simple act of listening has the power to transform not just their day, but yours as well.
If you enjoyed this, you might also enjoy my Life Satisfaction Assessment. It's a 30 minute program where I guide you through a deep dive into 10 areas of your life to assess what's bringing you joy and what's bringing you down. I call it Derailed. It's a fabulous place to begin a joy at work redesign.
